MendedThe loop
You replay the last conversation, edit what you should have said, imagine what they were thinking. This is rumination, and it feels like work, but it almost never resolves anything. The loop loosens when your attention has somewhere else to go, even somewhere small and boring. You are not trying to stop the thoughts. You are trying to stop feeding them.
Today’s small step
When the loop starts, say to yourself: “That is the loop.” Then wash one dish or fold one shirt.